Mafia insurance: an offer I can't refuse

I've had a letter from UK insurer Norwich Union Direct that reads more like a threat from the Mafia. Alongside a picture of an 'In Loving Memory' bouquet it says:

Accidents happen

Each year in the UK, hundreds of people fall on the stairs. Some are lucky and walk away. Others, however, aren't so lucky...

For peace of mind and to ensure "my loved ones will be properly looked after", I should pay Norwich union £2 a month. Sounds like protection money to me.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Protection money ok then I undercut Norwich Union, my offer is £1.50 per month to ensure your given the gift of still being able to walk!

Anonymous said...

My name is Becca Sibley and I work for NU in Customer Experience, and you've made us smile here this morning! We never realised they read quite like that.
Feel free to email me on rebecca.sibley@norwich-union.co.uk if you want to discuss our communications further!

Anonymous said...

That letter was probably devised by a load of over-paid "strategic marketers" or "insert over-hyped ridiculous job title here" people. It's like those Nationwide banking adverts but for real.

Here's some advice Becca: Sack them they are idiots!!

Anonymous said...

Run away, JD! I think Becca's about to make you an offer you can't refuse.

(Which makes a change from my bank's usual communications, which normally consists of an offer I can't understand, but still).

You'll be sleeping with the fishes tonight.

JD (The Engine Room) said...

Considering the number of products, services, individuals and companies that we've poked fun at over the course of this blog, I'd be quite surprised if we only had Norwich Union after us... and people ask why we don't use our real names!

I have to say though that I'm sure NU is a wonderful company with wonderful, talented employees that have no interest in dead horses, concrete boots etc etc.

Bill said...

See, this is a disadvantage of living in the same country as the Piranha brothers.

Anonymous said...

Damn I've been rumbled!! No seriously, We are definately interested in your comments!

Becca

Anonymous said...

Thanks for writing this.